Fantasy Gazette

It’s a cold Sunday afternoon in New York City on December 6th, 2020. Just 13 seconds remain on the clock.

The 0-11 Jets, led by Adam Gase, allow Las Vegas’ Henry Ruggs to slip behind their entire defense for a 46-yard touchdown. The Jets lose 31-23 and are now 0-12. That fateful day, Critical Gase Theory gained more victims.

Critical Gase Theory has taken NFL discourse by storm. It has risen to prominence in recent years and is the topic of countless heated debates online. The theory is named for former NFL coach Adam Gase, who left behind devastating stains on professional football through systematic oppression. It’s time we talked about it.

Critical Gase Theory (CGT) is a discipline, analytical tool, and approach that fantasy football players and NFL analysts use to as it relates to NFL players’ success on the field and in fantasy football. There are a lot of conversations and misconceptions about what CGT actually means. We’re here to give you the facts.

What is Critical Gase Theory, really?

In short, CGT asserts that NFL players are bad when playing for Adam Gase, but good when they aren’t.

If you have never played for Adam Gase, you have lived a privileged life, and gained an advantage on others. If you played for Adam Gase, you have been denied these chances.

If the NFL were to continue allowing Gase to coach, they would further suppress these player’s voices and ruin even more NFL careers before they even start.

Do we have any notable examples of CGT hurting people?

Oh yes.

Let’s begin with the most famous example: Titans QB Ryan Tannehill.

Ryan Tannehill had high NFL expectations, but faced institutionalized Gasism from 2016-18, and was sent away to Tennessee, his life nearly ruined. Since then, he hasn’t looked back. Tannehill has been an elite fantasy option and legitimate signal caller ever since. You tell us: Has Critical Gase Theory oppressed Ryan Tannehill?

Tannehill’s former teammate, WR DeVante Parker, was victimized. Parker had 72 catches, 1,202 yards, and 9 touchdowns in his first season no longer being oppressed because of his Gase.

Kenyan Drake and Jarvis Landry escaped and have enjoyed newfound efficiency and happiness. Kalen Ballage was destined for the Hall of Fame before Critical Gase Theory ruined his career.

“Yes, I dealt with Gasism when I was in Miami,” Drake said. “The entire organization was Gasist from the moment they brought that bug-eyed freak in. He made all of us bad football players. Now, because we don’t play for him, we are good ones.

“The guys in Arizona and Las Vegas don’t understand their privilege, and they don’t speak up for me. Their silence is violence.”

What are the arguments against Critical Gase Theory?

Many opponents view the concepts behind Critical Gase Theory as an effort to rewrite the NFL’s history and persuade players who didn’t play for Gase that they should feel guilty because of their advantages.

They often site the 2013 Denver Broncos as an example. Those Broncos scored more points in a season than any team in the history of the NFL. Adam Gase was somehow the offensive coordinator. We spoke with a quarterback on that team that wished to remain anonymous.

“Look, man, I never got victimized by this Critical Gase Theory thing. I worked for everything I had. Took years of sweat, labor, and my dad and brother also playing professional football to get me where I got. These guys complaining should just pull themselves up by their bootstraps.”

Those in disagreement also cite that not *every* player is good just because they don’t play for Adam Gase. What they fail to realize, experts agree, is that they would clearly be much worse if they did.

Are they teaching CGT it in schools?

Contrary to popular belief, CGT has not made its way into most public school curriculum outside of Florida and New York. The theory’s true home is being highly talked about on fantasy football podcasts and social media sites. The theory has divided NFL fans.

For example, Packer fans argue that Brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers are good quarterbacks for a variety of reasons that have nothing to do with Gase. Critical Gase Theory says that he was only good because Adam Gase wasn’t their coach. What do you think?

What Can I Do To Help?

Awareness is the first step when something as big as the NFL has been showing signs of Gasism. Posting on social media all the time is a great way to get everyone to care about something as much as you.

You need to educate your friends on Critical Gase Theory and how it has effected their favorite NFL teams and players. Remind them about the systems of Gasism that allow certain teams to thrive and others to go through pain and torture, like the Dolphins and Jets.

Know the facts, and be prepared to have honest discussions with your friends and remind them that their favorite teams are privileged because Gase doesn’t oppress them. You can act, or you can continue to be part of the problem.