Baby Conceived After Huge DFS Win Named In Honor Of Father’s Winning Players
A newborn baby boy from Milwaukee, WI has received quite the name as a tribute to his father’s recent fantasy football success.
A product of unprotected celebratory sex between lifelong Milwaukee residents Derrick and Kendra Jeffreys in early October, Alvin Stefon JuJu David Montgomery Colts Defense Younghoe Jeffries was welcomed into the world – exactly nine months after his father Derrick won a whopping $100 on DraftKings. Alvin’s father Derrick bet a single dime on the “Sexy 6.”
“We have literally never won anything before,” said Alvin’s mother Kendra. She then gleefully said: “Thanks to Derrick’s big win and those players, we got to spend a few wonderful nights getting drinks and late night apps at Applebee’s, and now we will always remember that moment every time we call little Alvin Stefon Juju David Montgomery Colts Defense Younghoe’s name.”
Derrick and Kendra assured us that Derrick will continue playing DFS this upcoming season, and plans to bet heavily on the Sexy 6. He hopes to once again win enough money to have celebratory unprotected sex with his wife and conceive another child. “Having sex that night with my wife was the second happiest I had been that day, and we can’t wait to feel the sensation of another huge DraftKings win followed by the conception of our second child.”
Beautiful.
Before leaving the Jeffries’ residence, young Alvin cried for several minutes and shat his pants. Life is truly a mystery.
Fantasy Gazette 