HEARTWARMING: GoFundMe To Get Small, Shitty Publication ‘Fantasy Gazette’ Verified Raises 13 Cents
It’s a story that would make even the Grinch smile.
A GoFundMe campaign was created to help a grassroots fantasy football news site raise the funds necessary to get verified on Twitter. Starting November 11th, 2022, Twitter’s “Twitter Blue” premium offering would grant users the
much sought-after blue checkmark, verifying the account possessing it. Twitter Blue also allows
users to edit tweets, post photos in 1080p, and gives massive losers the ability to change their
profile picture to any NFT in their wallet, should they wish to face even more public humiliation.
The campaign’s creator is Lucas Billings, 36, of Topeka, KS.
A Gazette reporter (unpaid) spoke with Billings to get the scoop on why he started this now-booming
campaign. He first discovered the Fantasy Gazette after seeing one of their many viral
headlines on Twitter. When asked if he actually clicks the links to provide the site with ad
revenue, he pretended to yawn really loudly and then told us he was in a hurry and that we
should ask the next question. Further questioning revealed his touching motives.
“I had a lot of extra money after 2 of my favorite Twitch streamers got banned for nudity,”
remarked Billings. “I decided to help a place in need, and where better than this really niche site
that has no real business model or financial future?” he added, like a smug prick.
Billings graciously donated all 13 cents on his own to “get the ball rolling”. Despite 17 total page
views, no other fans have donated to the campaign at this time.
When asked how he planned to present the money to the Fantasy Gazette should the campaign
reach its goal, Billings said he would just “shoot a DM to [Fantasy Gazette] and see if they have
CashApp or something.”
In the name of journalistic integrity, we must disclose that we definitely have $8.00 for this feature
but would really like other people to pay it for us instead. We also don’t have CashApp, moron.
When he’s not running highly questionable discord servers, Billings enjoys watching videos on
how to talk to women and become an alpha male. Perhaps we could all learn something from
this humble man and learn to fucking support the people who make good content instead of
trust fund millennials who got their job thanks to daddy’s connections.
At press time, Fantasy Gazette had not raised any money but had been ratio’d by the Fantasy Receipts account over 29 times, which is more than enough exposure to get the ball rolling.