Fantasy Gazette

CANTON, OH – The Fantasy Football Expo, a community event held annually featuring analysts and panels on fantasy football, has been cancelled after every analyst participating in the previous day’s flag football tournament tore their ACL.

“I’ve never seen anything like it,” said Richard Everton, the head athletic trainer who was stationed at the event. “Every single one of these unathletic 25-40 year olds all immediately tore their ACL when trying to make their first cuts of the day.”

Sunday’s Expo was supposed to be filled with booths of analysts passing out helpful information on the NFL, live drafts, and meet-and-greets. But the so-called “football experts” will all be undergoing surgery for their torn ACLs after all improperly running sluggo routes.

“They all knew what a sluggo route was, but none of them had ever even attempted one, or honestly played any tackle football, so the ACLs came off the bone super easily,” said Everett.

At press time, all the analysts were “ahead of schedule” in their ACL recovery and reportedly good to go for Week 1.