Fantasy Gazette

SAN FRANCISCO MEMORIAL HOSPITAL – Awkwardly breaking out a series of notecards in Ricky Pearsall’s hospital room, 49ers teammate Nick Bosa recited a heartfelt motivational speech to cheer up the recently shot wideout by regaling him with a story. “You know, it wasn’t long ago someone I truly admire also got shot at,” Bosa said, a lone tear making its way down his left cheek posthaste. “While I won’t say this legendary figure’s name, let’s just say he Trumped death, with a capital T. I know you got shot in the arm, but this man was hit in his ear, which is kind of scarier if you think about it. Anyway, he bounced back, and you can too, Ricky.” At press time, Bosa completed his speech and told members of the media this was the second scariest shooting he had happen this year.