CULVER CITY, CA – NFL Network is introducing a new subscription-based streaming feature that will just show a given user’s fantasy players repeatedly scoring touchdowns. “NFL Premium w/RedZone Gold is going to be a smash hit,” said Brian Rolapp, CEO. “Our users might enjoy our constant overstimulation of games and highlights on RedZone, but it has a massive flaw at
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The NFL has big plans for the game in Cleveland this weekend, a source close to the situation told the Gazette. The Arizona Cardinals are facing Browns this Sunday and both teams had quarterback uncertainty this week. According to our source, these “injuries” were staged as part of a larger plot. Kyler Murray and Deshaun Watson are young, talented, and
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LAS VEGAS, NV – After the Las Vegas Raiders recently announced rookie QB Aidan O’Connell would be their starter moving forward, Jimmy Garoppolo has come forward to state he is going to mew “harder than ever before” to regain the starting position. For the unfamiliar, “mewing” is a new internet craze in which you alter the position of your tongue
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Atlanta Falcons head coach Arthur Smith found himself in a familiar position after the team’s loss this past Sunday: answering for his questionable coaching decisions at the podium. Consistently, Smith has failed to utilize highly-drafted stars on an offense that now ranks in the bottom 5 in points. Smith has most infamously dodged critiques and made derisive comments at one
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MINNEAPOLIS, MN – The Vikings received a seismic shift in their 2023 NFL season Sunday when QB Kirk Cousins tragically suffered a torn achilles against the Green Bay Packers. After an MRI Monday confirmed the worst-case scenario, the team’s medical staff released an exciting report just a few minutes later that Cousins was “ahead of schedule” in recovering from the
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NEW YORK – The mobile payment service known as Venmo revealed to stockholders and the general public today that its entire company infrastructure is being kept alive by fantasy football players continuously sending the same twenty dollars back and forth throughout the course of the year. “Friends and colleagues that join leagues together are constantly moving the $20 league entry
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LOS ANGELES – Concerning reports have confirmed that Chargers “Superfan” Merianne Do, who became instantly famous for her over-the-top expressions on national television, does not in fact roster any Los Angeles Chargers on her fantasy football team. The story was brought to us by concerned friends and family members in the “Do Re Mi League” they play in together on
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Following yet another vicious brawl in the stands during a game, the NFL and NFLPA announced a joint statement during a press conference this week. The parties are hoping to put a swift end to the violence, and announced their recommendation during the event, which is that everyone going to NFL games should bring a gun for self-defense. “We are
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CLEVELAND, OH – Following a routine practice, members of the Cleveland Browns were reportedly gathered in a circle in the locker room and began telling stories of sexual adventures when the room suddenly became engulfed in awkward silence as the rotation of whose turn it was to speak was now upon QB Deshaun Watson. “So we’re up in the hotel
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Already, fantasy football players have dealt with an alarming number of injuries to key starters this season. While it’s obvious players like Emari Demercado and Bilal Powell are absolute f*cking studs, we know not every fantasy football enjoyer still has precious FAAB dollars to spend. These injuries are getting out of control. Sure, there’s the cheap turf fields and whoever
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Fantasy Gazette 